Slave

Slave - Kol Anderson I have said it before… and I will say it again! I am incredibly excited about this young author.

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Kol Anderson, writes the kind of books I like and manages to hit those emotions head on that some books just gently stroke and I love that! Slave is not a read that had the adrenaline pumping at an alarming rate like the Broken Series, but rather this novella plays with your heartstrings, tugging on them to almost breaking point. It’s not perfect and I felt the writing a little disjointed and lost it’s flow at times and whilst I loved Jesse, I didn’t wholeheartedly connect with Matt, even in the end not completely believing his sincerity… I was almost there but not quite!

Jesse is a natural submissive, his whole being calls out to a master to take control of his life, unable to perform that task on his own, he needs guidance. When he breaks up with Matt his master he falls into such a deep depression he is unable to claw his way out… he wants to block out the anguish and torment that is a constant in his heart, and his only outlet to oblivion… is pain, and that pain comes at the hands of Noah!!! Noah is a sadist and his particular brand of pain is brutally delivered without the escape of a safe word… to be endured, but not to satisfaction for Jesse, he just wants to forget if only for a little while!

In Slave I somehow felt disconnected to the physical pain that Jesse suffers at the hands of Noah, and I think that’s because the real pain in this book is in Jesse’s heart. We get some insight to this in his journal entries which are interspersed throughout the book, and his feelings of devastation had big fat tears rolling down my face… I have to say Kol’s writing of those entries is beautiful. What we see is a boy/slave who after losing his master, no longer wants to feel the emotional pain of his broken heart… Lost and alone, he wants to forget, and physical pain is his only escape from the emotions that overwhelm him, because without Matt, the man he loves and his master he is wading through mud, lost, with all grasp and control of his life gone.

But it’s not only the feeling of abandonment, Jess had been with Matt for three years, however they both have differing ideas of what a relationship entails… Jesse wants love, unconditional and forever and that is what he had freely given to Matt… his heart and soul! Matt on the other hand doesn’t do exclusive, although for two years of their relationship he had tried… so when Matt starts playing around with one night stands… he may as well have ripped Jesse’s heart out of his chest and stamped on it! …and in Jesse’s eyes that is exactly what he did… he had been rejected and unable to satisfy his master.

I am sitting on the fence with Matt, as I am not really sure if I liked him or not, in fact he totally pissed me off at times due to his inconsiderate and quite frankly blaze attitude, as a dom and knowing Jesse’s nature he should have ensured that Jesse was taken care of and not left to his own devices! Although he did redeem himself in the end, I was still cross, but looking at it objectively… people break up all the time, Matt had cheated, but he had also always been upfront about his own nature and tendencies to wander and I think he had just underestimated Jesse’s neediness!

Kol Anderson characterisation of Jesse was excellent, I totally connected with his desolation and my chest was hurting watching him deal with his heartache, trying to remain positive for his Mother whilst coping with her illness and with no friends… his only outlet for his emotions had been his journal, and I have to say his little bit of manipulation seemed totally out of character and a real shocker… but hey, GO JESSE!

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